I've read a lot about dog training to raise my Weimaraner puppy. The best method to get the dog to do what you want is to captivate him, not to wrestle forces with him, shout at the poor thing, let alone punish him or hit him. Somewhere I heard the phrase: man is a dog with an opposable thumb
. The trainer was referring to how easy it is to induce a man to do what his girlfriend wants, as long as she knows how to apply the leadership of positive reinforcement. And also because men, like dogs, can't think of more than one thing at a time!
I learned this with my Weimaraner. Dogs, like humans, always signal in the second before what they intend to do next. If your tutor takes too long to send a derivation command, the dog takes off, for example, to cross the street! But if the human notices an instant before and shoots the command (stay
or no
or any other), the educated dog, who has not yet started the action, obeys.
On the other hand, if the dog has already started running to launch in front of the cars, there is no point in shouting no
, stay
, together
, stop
. If the action has already been triggered, it is almost impossible to stop it [1].
If you don't want to apply repression, just give the command come
and when he approaches you reward him with a treat. If you don't have a treat, give him affection and play with him.
Dog or human, when it comes to emotions, both react in the same way! Being able to avoid the first outburst, it is very easy to manage the potential conflict. And the treat? It can be the derivation of your attention to something more interesting, more fun or more rewarding. It can be a word of encouragement, praise, friendship, a pat on the back, a hug, a look, a smile.
This applies not only to marital confrontations, but to any others, at work, in traffic, with friends, in short, in all situations.
In terms of cost/benefit, it is much cheaper to assume a small loss than to get into a squabble and pay much more dearly. My friend Fabiano Gomes, formerly a successful lawyer, now Director of one of our schools of the DeROSE Method, when approached by someone who wanted to sue another person, asked him:
- Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy? If the brawler said he wanted to be right, then he accepted the cause. But if the plaintiff declared that he wanted to be happy, the advice he gave was:
- Then forget about it. Fighting brings happiness to no one.