Translation of the chapter of the book Boas Maneiras by Prof. DeRose
More than half a century of life taught me to accept a human flaw as incurable: its dissatisfaction.
I went around the world countless times and met many, many people. I had intimate contact with a multitude of initiatory fraternities, cultural entities, professional colleges, sports academies, universities, schools, companies, federations, foundations .... In all of them, without exception, there was discontent.
In all human groups there is a cohesive force called egregore. According to the law of action and reaction, every force tends to generate an opposing force. Therefore, in these same groupings, small maladjustments constantly appear, which begin to take on dramatic contours through the refraction of an egocentric perspective that only takes into account the satisfaction of the expectations of an isolated individual who analyzes the facts according to his own convenience.
In other words, if the facts could be analyzed without the harmful interference of egos, it would be seen that there is nothing wrong with these facts except emotional instability. Instability that is congenital in all human beings since we are still in the process of evolution. After all, we are an extremely young species compared to other life forms on the planet. We are in the infancy of our evolution and, as such, we inevitably commit the natural immaturities of that phase.
Note that very few people are satisfied with their world. In general, everyone has complaints about their job, their subordinates and their superiors; their pay and recognition for their work; complaints about their parents, their children, their spouses, their condominium, the government of their country, their state, their city, the police, the justice system, the traffic department, taxes, rude neighbors, unqualified drivers, unruly pedestrians.... There is a lot to complain about, isn't there?
If we go down that road, we will conclude that the world is not a good place to live and we will continue to be bitter and make others bitter. Or we will commit suicide!
In ancient times, the Hindus observed this pandemic phenomenon of human dissatisfaction and taught how to resolve it:
If the floor has thorns, you don't want to cover the floor with leather. Cover your feet with shoes and walk on the thorns without worrying about them
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In other words, the solution is not to complain about people and circumstances and try to change them, but to educate oneself to adapt. The right attitude is to stop childishly wanting things to change to satisfy your ego, but to change yourself to adapt to reality. This is maturity. The other attitude is neurotic, for you will never be able to change people or institutions to suit your desires. Don't be a misfit.
So, enough of this. Let's accept people and things as they are. And let's try to like them. You will notice that they start to like you much more and that situations that seemed immovable before, now change spontaneously, without you having to complain to them. Try it, you will like the result!